There are some days that are SO hard for me to even function as a human being, that my commitment to writing feels like an unreachable task.
Cushings Syndrome sucks. It does. there is no easy way around it. There is no real cure. There are herbs and oils that are helping to lessen my symptoms, BUT no matter what I am doing to counteract the effects of the over production of cortisol, if I am adding STRESS, nothing is going to help.
This season = stress.
Stress from being the only adult that is parenting my children during this season.
Stress due the only intelligent conversations that I am having on a daily basis, occur with a 6 a 5 and a 1 year old.
Stress because when the man I love works more than 80 hours per week, the last thing he wants to do is deal with a crying, tired child, or a crying tired wife.
Stress because I feel like a failure as a follower of Christ. I know that I should just trust the Lord to take control and take care of us. But, the exhaustion of this disease is REAL. The emotions are REAL. The work is REAL.
To many, I look normal. I can muster up enough "pretty and poise" to go out in "public" and seem put together. I'm not
.
This. Season. Sucks.
We all have them.
I know that we all have crummy seasons in life. I know that every single person in this world does NOT live an instagram perfect life. Sometimes, I wish that more people would commit themselves to living an honest, authentic life. To portray their TRUTH via social media, instead of a fantasy.
Dont get me wrong, everyone deserves to have a fantasy. Shoot, in my fantasy, I would look the way I looked 10 years ago, my children would be perfectly behaved and my husband would leave his job and wisk us all off to a week in Disney World! But, as awesome as that sounds. (man a week at Disney is SO needed right now) It is NOT my TRUTH.
My truth is this:
My name is Danielle
I love Jesus.
I live in a small, small, small town on a gorgeous apple farm.
I am married to the most wonderful man and he is my best friend. He works day and night to provide for our family.
I have 3 precious gifts from the Lord. They are smart, and funny and loving...and crazy, and exhausting and hard.
I am committed to giving my children a life full of love, and faith and exploration and truth.
I don't have the outward appearance that I would like to have, but I am content with who I am.
I am always tired. I am always dreaming. I am always wishing that I could be whisked away to someplace fantasmical.
But, when the day is done, I am Danielle, I love Jesus and I love my family.
We were meant to live this life in community with others. HOW can we find a community of others LIKE us, if we are not being authentic with our portrayal of ourselves?
I challenge you to be real. Be You. Be tired. Be natural. Be messy-haired. Be yoga pants and tank top. Be YOUR TRUTH.
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| This is me, right now, 4:30PM on Tuesday. Yoga pants, tank top, no make-up, bags under my eyes. But what you can't see in the photo, is that I have an adorable baby at my feet, an inquisitive 5 years old chatting with me while I type and a smart 6 year old laying on the couch reading. Truth, may not be pretty, but it sure is BEAUTIFUL to me. |
Use Social Media to help create authentic community. Don't contribute to the illusion of "perfect".
This season, is a season of TRUTH.
{beBlessed} and have a GREAT day.
